Aftermath of A Suicide
by brezzybrez
Summary: everyone feelings on leah's suicide.
1. Death

Leah POV's

I stood on the edge of the cliff, looking out in the ocean in the moonlight. The ocean looked so black and dark, that it was beautiful and calling to me. I then looked down at the jagged rock that the tide reveals to the surface. There was no hope for me now. Everyone had their imprints, including my baby brother and Embry, the very two who promise that they would always be there for her. I slowly lift one corner of my mouth into a smirk. _Stupid of them to promise such a thing, _I thought as I watched the waves crashed again the rocks.

My mother and Charlie were off in their little own world ever since they got married, so she really didn't have anyone. I was so tired. Tired of everything and everyone. Fate had finally warred me down to the point of no return. It had taken everything from me. My loves for the two men in my life, my femininity, my best friend, my life as someone great and my father. I heard a rustle in the brush, so I looked over my shoulder.

A russet head popped out of the brushes. _Jake,_ I thought as I watched the head disappear. Then He appeared.

"Lee, what are you doing here?" he asked. I inched closer to the edge. I watched his face turned worried. "What are you doing?"

I turned around to look at him and I smile slightly. He looked worried, but I knew better. He had the half-leech. _He is faking it._ I felt tears come to my eyes.

"Goodbye, Jacob," I said as I took the final step back and pludge to my death.


	2. Lost Love

Lost Love

I sat down abruptly at the new that the man in front of me just said. Emily, my wife, had stopped what she was doing and stared at the man.

"Are you sure? Are you absolutely, positively sure that Leah killed herself?" I asked as I felt the tears come to my eyes. Even after being married to Emily for 3 yrs hadn't dampen my feeling for the girl who had taken her life.

"Yeah. Jacob saw her do it," Paul said, "He was on his way back from the Cullens, when he picked up her scent."

"But why?" Emily asked as she walked over behind me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Why would she kill herself?"

"I don't know. Maybe because she was the only one who hadn't imprinted yet," Paul guessed as he shrugged. "Anyways, it doesn't matter. She's gone and there is nothing we can do about. I just thought you guys deserve to know since she is your family. I guess I will see you around." He left after that. I winced at the family part. It was true. I was a part of the Clearwater and Young family now that I have married Emily. It just wasn't the way that everyone had thought I would get into the family.

"oh Sam," Emily wept as she planted herself in my lap and buried her face. To be quite honest, I wanted to push her away and weep on my own, but I didn't. So I held her close. Emily ended up crying herself to sleep, so I put her to bed. As I walked back to the master bedroom, I pasted my son's room. I smiled to myself as I thought about my son. He was our honeymoon baby. He was so precious to Emily and me. I was glad that he wasn't here.

Despite that Emily and I hurt her, Leah became involved in our son's life and didn't hold anything against him. He was so taken with Aunt Leah. I gently tucked Emily in bed and pulled out something in my side table. I returned out to the living room and sat down in my favorite chair.

I opened the cover of my book and Leah stared right back at me. When Emily fist move in with me, I had to get rid of anything that dealt with Leah, to not make feel Emily guilty and myself for I couldn't hold on to the past. But I couldn't bring myself to throw away anything that dealt with him, so I kept it and put it away somewhere that Emily wouldn't go in.

I found myself caressing the picture with my finger and a teardrop fell on the photo. I finally wept alone for my lost love.


	3. comrade

Comrade

Paul

This is how I ended up spending the rest of the night. I could be making love to my wife and imprint, but nooo sir. That stupid bitch had to go and ruined it. I was sitting at home, minding my own business, then all of the sudden Jacob comes busting in. And that how I am here with the rest of the pack, excluding Sam (how the jackass got excluding is beyond me), was searching for.

Don't get me wrong; Leah was a good comrade when the fighting got rough. She was someone who you could count on to have your back in a fight. But that's all she was good for. I didn't find anything in my area, so I returned to where Sue was waiting.

"Sorry, I didn't find anything," I said.

Jared

When I got the call, I couldn't believe it. The person who I thought was one of the strongest people that I know decided to kill herself. I hung up the phone and kiss Kim goodnight, letting know where I would be if she needed anything. I left the house and walked to where everyone was meeting. I don't know why her mother was going to look for her. If she really did went over the cliff and hit the rock below, there is no way in hell that we will find her. But no one told Sue that.

The others were there, excluding Sam, and when I ask about it, no one would answer me. We spilt up and went into different parts of the woods near the cliffs. I called out her name several times, but got no answer. I phased to my wolf form for a bit before deciding to phase back. I returned back to sue.

"I'm sorry, I didn't find anything," I said to Sue. I still couldn't believe that Leah would do this. I mean, yeah, she had it rough with everything, but I thought she would pull thought.

"I just don't understand how she can do this to me. I thought everything was getting better," Sue wailed. I patted her shoulder until she felt like she was done.

"alright, everyone. We will call it quits tonight. We will continue in the morning," She said. I really wanted to tell it was no use, but no one dare argue with her.


	4. Big Sis

A/N: I just saw Eclipse and it was amazing. I think Julia Jones did a good job portraying Leah. Anyways, here is the next reaction. Big Sis

My sister. The one who taught everything was gone. We used to do everything together. Granted sometime Leah didn't feel that way about me, but I know that She came to love me for it. It was my way of showing her that I was still here for her. But that all change when I imprinted on my Robin. Robin was the total opposite of my sister and I love her for it. It was a totally change in what I was use to. When I got the call from Billy on my cell phone, my heart broke.

"Seth? What's wrong?" Robin had asked. I stood up.

"I got to go home now," I said.

"But you just got here. Stay awhile. I am sure that your mother can handle it," She said with a pout lip. I turned and looked at her.

"My mother can't handle it," I said as I watched her get that mean look in her eye. "my sister just committed suicide, Robin. I really have to be there for my mom." I left the house after that. I ran for the woods and phased. I ran home quickly, phased back and went inside. Mom looked up and ran to me as soon as I walked into the room.

I broke down in mom's arm. After a couple of minutes, she told that she got the wolves together to look for her, just in case if she survive and told me to stay home, just in case of she came home. She left the house and I was alone. Robin tried to call, but I ignore her. I remember that Leah wanted to hang out, but I blew her off, so I could spend time with Robin. Now I wish with all of my heart to take it back.

After an hour, Mom returned home with no new and I told her the same. We didn't know what to do. I sat with mom while wishing that my big sis would come back home, alive.


	5. Baby Girl

Baby Girl

I sat with my son all night long, eventually falling asleep in his arms. When I woke up, it was about 7 am in the morning. I decide to get up, without waking Seth, but that was impossible. He woke up the moment I accidentally jerk his arm.

"What mom? Leah home?" he asked, his speech slurred with sleep. Even her name brought heartache to me.

"No," I chocked. Seth must have realized what he said because he held me after that.

"Don't worry. I am sure that she is alright," he lied. I could tell. I am his mother after all. I patted his arm before getting up and going to the kitchen. I thought about her, my daughter. Leah, the one who committed suicide. I never thought things were that bad but of course, I hardly pay attention anymore, because I was and am in love and everything seem to be going well. I Find myself choking back a sob. I had a sudden urge to go to Leah's room, and I did.

Over the night, I thought myself _why? Why had Leah kill herself? _I slowly started to go up the stairs, Seth forgotten. I find myself going down the hallway and into my daughter's room. I looked around the room, taking in everything. I noticed there was a notebook on the bed, so I picked it up. I flipped thru the pages until one word caught my eye.

Suicide

I turned to the page and read it.

I am so tired of this life. I am getting nothing from it. Everyone is off in their little world, leaving me with only patrols and loneliness. I wanted to ask the elders if I could leave, but I decide not to, seeing is how I am the only one still doing the patrols and keeping La push safe from other vampires.

_Since I have been stuck in this routine, I have thought about it. Suicide. But something is always stopping me from do it. Mom, Seth…Jacob._

My eyes widen at the name that came after Seth's. So What I thought was true. My daughter had loved Jacob, but she never said anything because of his imprint on the daughter of the girl who got everything she ever wanted. I read on.

_It is getting to be too much for me. Holding in my love for the man I can never have. Never getting a chance to have a child, or finding love. I am just getting tired of it. I know I am repeating myself over and over again. But it is getting to be too much._

I looked at the date at the top of the paper. Day before the big day. I heard the phone ringing and Seth picking it up.

"Hello? Oh hey Jared….What?….You found her….i see, I will tell mom," I hear him hear. I flew down the stair at the "you found her" part.

"Seth! What is going on? Did Jared find her?" I asked, eager to get answer.

"Yeah, but mom….it's not good new," he mumbled.

"Just tell me," I cried.

"Jared found her body."

* * *

Hey, Only one more chapter after this one. And you all can guess who is it. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Review went you are done, please.


	6. Lost Chance to Love

Lost chance to Love

It had been two weeks since we found her body. Her mother and Seth came by to pick up the body. I heard the news, I didn't want to believe it, even thought I saw her jump with my own eyes. Sue had planned the funeral and had invited everyone to it. I was getting ready for the funeral.

I didn't even bother to call Nessie. To be honest, I haven't spoke to her since that night.

FlashBack

_I was running to the Cullens' in wolf form. When I arrived, I changed back and put om my cut-offs. I walked to the cottage that Edward and Bella had lived in, but I stopped when I saw the scene in front of my eyes._

_Nahel, the other half-bleed, was kissing my Nessie. They broke apart and smiled up at each other. Something made Nessie turn my way and she saw me. Her face said everything. I started to walked away._

"_Jacob!" she cried as she came outside. "I'm sorry, bit it…just I want to experience love without it being forced at me."_

"_so you decide to go behind my back about it?" I yelled. _

"_Yes. Jacob. I know it was wrong of me to go behind your back about it. I won't deny that I love you, but I am not __**in **__love with you. I love you as a best friend," She explained, " and if you think about it, Jacob, you love me as a best friend too."_

_I didn't stick around after that. I phased and ran away._

_End of flashback _

I thought about everything she said as I left the Cullens' territory. I manage to figure out that I love Nessie in a friendship. And then I thought about Leah and how she was always there for me. I thought about her personality and how she would tell me straight even thought I wouldn't want to hear.

_Oh god, I'm in love with Leah _I thought as I walked back to the La Push. Then I caught _her _scent and follow it. The next thing I knew was that she was over the cliff and headed to the rocks below.

Which lead us to the event here: Leah's Funeral. My dad came to the door and asks me if I was ready to go. We left the house and headed to the cemetery. Everyone was there, which was a surprise.

The funeral was a quick affair, then everyone was allow to place a flower on her casket, symbol the love that they had for her.

Then she lowered into the ground and my lost chance to love her.


End file.
